i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize