is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
