Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
God, you're like boner-b-gone
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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