I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I fill condoms, not promises.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize