O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
