No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
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Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
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I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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