your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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