I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
lol hangovers are for mortals.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
