So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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