I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
