Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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