I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
