you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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