3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
