Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
