I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
