That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
