He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I had to cum in my sink.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
