like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
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HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
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