Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Women Are Tweeting Photos Of Their Underwear To Support Rape Victim Whose Thong Was Cited During Trial
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
21 ‘Don’t Say It’ Tweets That Are Gonna Get Said Every Damn Time
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?