i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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