Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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