This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
