I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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