I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
