Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
