I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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