WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
