Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
