If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
