I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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