Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize