Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize