All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just forgot I was standing up.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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