Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
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