I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza