dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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