Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
