Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
