I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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