You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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