how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
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I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
So much Jack, so little girl.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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