I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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