What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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