Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize