remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
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the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
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Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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