Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize