SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize