Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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