i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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