bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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