Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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