whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize