Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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